[Mishmash] Some Math Humor

[Richard Barth]

Forwarded from the mailing list of a local ham radio club.



>Normally I would never send this on this list but there are far, far 
>too many engineers (or at least extras who took the old Advanced 
>exam and struggled through Calc equations) who have dealt with this 
>foe for far too long not to get a good morning chuckle with their coffee.
>
>Hope I don't step on toes and it's taken in the humorous vein it is written.
>
>TEACHER ARRESTED.. - A public school teacher was arrested today at 
>John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a 
>flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a 
>slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, 
>Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez said he believes the man is a 
>member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the 
>man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math 
>instruction. "Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzalez said. "They 
>desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on 
>tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names 
>like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have 
>determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of 
>medieval with coordinates in every country.  As the Greek 
>philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every 
>triangle.' When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, 
>"If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Math Instruction, He 
>would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told 
>reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound 
>statement by the president.